On Making Decisions

When it comes to decision-making, everyone says to follow your heart. But how?

I am used to going to the forest or traveling to distant places for a few days when I need to make (big) decisions. In this way, I withdraw myself from the regular flow of daily life and the influences of others to turn inward to my inner self. Or if I don’t have those luxuries, I will find a quiet place, sit, and breathe. There, I find the clarity.

When it comes to making decisions, we usually weigh the benefits and drawbacks of one option over another. What we get and what we lose. But “it is not all about what we get, it is about what (really) matters to us” (Sadhguru).

I usually check my motivation for those decisions. Is this the happiness, comfort, peace, or a means of living that I am pursuing? Or is this fuelled by fear, worries, and anxieties? Whatever it is, I choose the one that makes my heart jump the most. The one that I can work at tirelessly, above time, and anything else. The one that I will not regret in my lifetime.

Too often, we are restricted by time, means of living, and comfort. Is this the life you want to live? I ask myself whenever the question comes.

I remembered when I was in India, after a stay of four months, I was almost exhausted due to the heat (45 degrees Celsius) and malnourishment. It was my Mother who encouraged me to stay up till the end of my term. She said, “At least, try yourself for six months and see what happens.” And I did. Things transformed beautifully in the end. I stayed for another 3 months (making it 10 months in total) and had chances to travel to different places in India, even got another research project. If I hadn’t stayed on that day, I might not have had the courage to continue working and traveling to other countries afterward. Uganda, Tunisia, Cambodia, all are beautiful countries.

Hence, I had a lesson for myself. Don’t make decisions when you are desperate. Make up your mind when you are in the most blissful and calm state. But once you have decided, do not waver the direction. On your journey, surely obstacles and challenges will come up, but do not let them affect your long-term goals, your long-term well-being. As Master Shi mentioned in his Ted talk, only then, you can reach the peak.

May you find an answer within you. A lucid mind can clear the confusion, without fear, anxiety, or worries.

After all, it is not all about what you get, it is about what (really) matters to you.